Pinch me now.
I am a mother. Encik Lebah is now a father.
And we are now new parents.
To our adorable little baby son, Muhammad Ammar Haikal bin Mohammad Najib.
Born in our Hospital Kuala Lipis. 3.5kg.
By Emergency Lower Segment Caesarian Section for secondary arrest.
And he is now,a healthy 2months old baby boy,how time flies!
Alhamdulillah.Alhamdulillah.Alhamdulillah.
Today, i would like to share my labor and birth experience to you and moms to be, of course.
I took leave when i was about 36weeks pregnant.
When i was considered term.
I wanted to be prepared. We wanted to be prepared.
My pregnancy was smooth thru out the 3trimesters.
I was given code of no risk. Or white label on the pink maternity book.
Some thinks taking leave early as wasting time.
Some thinks you should wait till you start labor. Then you take leave.
Well, i didnt think like that.
Giving my stressful job as a medical doctor, and since i have more than 30days unused leave, i was like why not?
And i thought baby will come out early.
During my leave, i was able to be fully prepared for our baby.
We assembled baby cot, did all baby laundry, took time to go dating with hubby, more of babymoons, sleep as much as i could,did exercise and walking, did lots of reading bout confinement and taking care of newborn, read al-quran and praying for our baby to arrive safely to this world.
Deep inside me, i was still nervous.
What if this and what if that?
You know doctors are truly the worst patients?!
I remember that day, Hari Asyura, 14.11.13.
Encik Lebah was oncall.
The night before, we were talking about when will we meet our baby.
Since we were ready n all.
And i was 39weeks 6days already.
Encik Lebah was talking to my huge belly, and said "baby jom kluar jom, jom jumpa mummydaddy!"
Nothing prepares me for the labor to come.
That night, about 1am, i felt the first contraction. It wasnt that painful. But it was regular.
1 in 10minutes.
Getting more painful by 6am, but still bearable.
But this time i could not sleep already.
It was 2 in 10minutes. Lasted about 15-20seconds.
Encik Lebah came home and examined me.
We went to see our obstetrician about 9am, and i was still closed.
Went to do ctg, and due to my regular contractions, i was advised for admission.
Butterfly in my stomach.
And this was the hospital that i work there everyday.
And they were all my colleques and bosses.
But i was still scared and nervous as hell.
I could not imagine how other mothers felt, giving they have no medical background and privilege to stay in single room.
I was lucky my husband was there all the time, thruout my labor pain.
Thank you Allah.. Thank u husband sbb belajar sungguh2 dulu sampai jadi doktor and teman me the whole time i was in labor.Alhamdulillah.
Overnight. Pain getting more intense.
I could not help it.
I was restless.
My husband also restless.
I finally succumbed to 2pethidine injections that made me so sleepy, but did not help at all with my pain. I felt like it was getting stronger and stronger. Worse now as i was drowsy due to that pethidine.
4 in 10minutes,40seconds, felt like forever.
Obstetric team came that morning and saw that i was in pain.
I was 5cm. Baby's doing good.
Went to labor room.
Artificial rupture of membrane (ARM) was done, and alhamdulillah it was clear still altho ive been contracting strongly since last night.
After that ARM, the pain was unbearable.
With entonox or without, it was excruciating.
I came to a point where i was literally crying, wailing, and sobbing, as i could not bear the pain anymore. And i was still 6-7cm.
Hours after that, i felt like my tears gone dry, i was still same.
I could see my husband holding his tears seeing me in pain, he tried to comfort me in everyway he could, rubbing my back, holding my hair, whispering i love you i love you, teaching me to selawat, praying for me and baby, kissed my forehead, but nothing could ease the pain.
I could feel the pressure getting more intense around pelvic area, i constantly thought that i need to go to toilet, i even begged my colleque to let me go to the toilet.
And she reassured me that it was the urge, the feeling you get when your baby coming down.
Contractions after contractions. Nurses came to comfort me but i was sobbing, i forgot everything already. I just need to get this baby out.
I was afraid i could die from this unbearable pain.
And still, after hours, i was still 6-7cm.
My obstetrician did the final examination,and i tell you, it was so so so painful,that i almost screamed in pain. (I totally forgot that she is my boss!)
And she decided for a EMLSCS.
Baby was too big and canal was narrow.
My husband kissed me and after informed consent, i was pushed to operating theatre.
It was scary. But i only think about my baby.
I wanted him to be safe. To be born healthy.
This was first time i became a patient,and it was totally strange.
It was scarier since i knew everything they gonna do to me in next few minutes.
I was on the table with contractions n i was counting for the spinal anesthesia to kick in, and wow, in minutes, all the pain was gone. Completely gone.
And i couldnt move my legs, couldnt feel a thing.
It was weird. I remember thinking, what if i couldnt move my legs forever..?
I was lying flat, i could partially see my obstetrician and my colleque getting ready to make incision on me. I could feel the scalpel. Layer by layer they opened me up.
I felt the pushing, the pulling but not the pain.
Then i felt my obstetrician hand went into my uterus and grab my baby's head
He was finally out.He was passed on to his father who was in green sterile gowns, ready for him in peadiatric station. He led out good strong cries, and my life has changed forever.
I am a mother now. Alhamdulillah..and I could hear my husband whispered azan to his ears..
My husband showed me our son.
That was my first glance of our son, and i was like, alhamdulillah thank you Allah..he has big eyes, rosy cheeks, and chubby! He is beautiful.
It was precious. Priceless moments. And my tears streaming down my cheeks. I finally gave birth to this beautiful son on the due date 15.11.13 at 6.28pm..alhamdulillah syukur..
(Do you know only 5% baby born on their due date?!)
I was given intrathecal morphine. And sent to recovery room for some time. I was drowsy and shaking. Felt so cold.
Next, i was pushed to the postnatal ward. Cubicles of four, for observation.
There, they placed my son next to me. Hes just so cute but i was too numb, cannot move my legs still. Tried breastfeeding him, and he latched on few minutes and then went to sleep.
The nurses helped me a lot. Attended my baby and me everytime we needed them.
Reassured me and lend me their hands.
I had quite number of visitors then i had to move back to my single room.
We were discharged on day 2 post surgery, my catheter was off and i was able to ambulate slowly, but the pain was quite intense especially when you change positions.
I was like, i thought i had intrathecal morphine in me?
My husband was the star of all time.
He helped a lot with baby since i couldnt move much. I love you sayang.
Had specialists and colleques visited us and baby. Thank u guys so much.
My families came all the way from Kelantan and Sabak Bernam.
It was just like a dream.
And now there are three of us!
The Najib's!
And this is just the beginning!
our first few selfies with baby!
When you thought it was easy for you as a doctor, actually you have no idea what labor is like until you experience it yourself.
You never know how painful vaginal examinations are, how you need all those comforting words from your colleques,
How you need all those tender loving care from the team.
These were vital, as you feel like you are in a strange place and you are in pain, and everybody was looking at your progress, checking you every few hours..
You cannot possibly imagine how women in labor feel like untill you are one of them.
Seriously. I was one of them. And now i truly understand. Finally.
And i learned that, you never know your risk until it was too late.
I maybe on no risk code, but what if i choose to do the all natural homebirth, with my husband who is also a medical doctor, we never know that i could not progress.
And that i had cephalopelvic dispropotion, and that the baby was too big for normal birth.
And that the baby could get in distress, pass meconium due to strong long contractions.
There are so many things that can go wrong, but at least we have tried to give the best chance for baby to be delivered in safe place.
To the go-all-natural group, dont think twice.
Think 1000times before you choose homebirth.
Think for your baby, put you and baby safety first.
After all, we doctors want you to be safe. Period.
P.s when you hold your baby in your arms, you'll forget all the pain. Its just so worth it..:)
Alhamdulillah..
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